


If you stopped (you'd let them down)

by shippingParaphernalia



Category: Sanders Sides, Thomas Sanders
Genre: Angst, Both of those sound edgy as hell i'm so sorry, Dark Patton, Gen, How Do I Tag, I Don't Even Know, If you haven't guessed this is pretty patton centric, Morality | Patton Sanders - Freeform, Moving On, Oneshot, Other, POV Second Person, Patton has the patience of a saint, Patton is important, Snapped Patton, Sort of anyway, There are no happy endings in my universe, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, What would happen if Patton left, and issues, this is pure self indulgent edginess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-12
Updated: 2017-11-12
Packaged: 2019-02-01 11:02:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12703695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shippingParaphernalia/pseuds/shippingParaphernalia
Summary: When the others tease you– when they tell you you need to get more serious, you need to actually contribute, you need to conform to how they think you’d be important– you laugh it off.You're already important.(Also known as The Fic In Which Patton Explains How Life Would Be Without Him But In Second Person)





	If you stopped (you'd let them down)

 

You know that you’re important.

Yes, you can be annoying at times, what with your puns and inability to take things seriously and whatnot, but you’re not an idiot– you know that without all these things, Thomas’s mind would be a very dark place to be. If you decided to just  _stop_ , to leave like Logan or quit like Virgil, you know that the others would not be able to function.

If you  _stopped_ , Roman would first try to fill in your spot. He can be a pretty funny guy when he wants to be. He’d clumsily attempt to imitate you, to throw out a tentative joke like a fishing line when a situation got heated, and wait to see if the others took the bait.

But Roman is young. He’s inexperienced. At least when it comes to dealing with the others. He’d crack the joke too soon, or make it the expense of someone else, and his attempts would always end with one of the others getting angry and the situation escalating even further. He may be a prince, but prince does not equal savior and sometimes the hero that the town really needs is the fool in the feline getup.

If Roman tried to copy you, he’d fail.

And you’d let him down.

If you  _stopped_ , Virgil would  _start_. After years of differentiating wrong from right, years having feelings both happy and otherwise, Thomas would naturally panic at this sudden abandonment. And panicking happens to fall under Virgil’s umbrella of expertise.

Virgil wouldn’t mind all this sudden work demand. For all his complaints of working overtime you know he likes spending time with you all. Likes feeling as though he belongs. You’ve seen the smiles he hides and the laughs he tries to disguise as coughs, and you relate. It’s hilarious. Of all the sides,  _Virgil_  (the moon to your sun, the dark to your light) is the one you relate to the most. But it makes sense: You hide your frowns with smiles. He hides his smiles with frowns. And every time you give him words of encouragement to help him ‘come out of his shell’, you feel the hypocrisy tightening around your throat like a noose.

But just because you can relate to Virgil doesn’t mean you should leave him in charge. With him controlling Thomas’s emotions (or rather, lack of them) the overall atmosphere of the mind palace would darken. Thomas would sink under the ocean of fears Virgil had unknowingly poured out for him.

If Virgil  _started,_ he wouldn’t be able to  _stop._

And you’d let him down.

If you  _stopped_ , Logan would be glad at first. He wouldn’t say so– even the bluntest of the sides has some tact– but he would be. Even after trying to learn about each other, you two have always been on uneven ground: you admire and love him, he considers you (at best) a nuisance. With you gone, he’d think that he could finally get all the work he wanted done. No more procrastination, no more unnecessary feelings, no more being teased on incorrect usage of the word infinitesimal. Just good old intellectual pursuits. It wouldn’t take him long to realize he was wrong.

Without you, Thomas would withdraw from his work. His videos wouldn’t be half as uplifting, just a jumble of hollow words and semi-intelligent facts propelled by a fear of failure. Logan would falter.  
He’d look for people to point fingers at for this disruptance, and settle on you– or at least, had things been running normally, where you would have been. Where you  _should_  have been. This lack of logic would cause Logan to grow angry. How could you have left them? Didn’t you care? So much for being at the center of  _Thomas’s_  feelings– you obviously only cared for  _your own_. He wouldn’t admit to himself how much he missed you. He’d unknowingly seek someone out to comfort him, and come up empty. All these emotions; no one to help him navigate them– finally, the coldest of the sides would thaw.

If Logan thawed, he’d stop being logical. He’d see everything through a tint of emotion he’d never learned to manage.

And you’d let him down.

So when the others tease you– when they tell you you need to get more serious, you need to actually contribute, you need to conform to how  _they_  think you’d be important– you laugh it off.

You know that you’re important.

You’ve always been important.

And maybe one day you  **will**   _stop_ , just so you can see your predictions play out. Just so you can let them all down.


End file.
